You took your eyes off the prize....

I ran into an acquaintance at the gym last week and we chatted as she elliptical-ed away and I stretched.  After initial hellos, I asked her how things were going.  "WELLLLLLLLLLLLLL, ok, I guess," was the response, with a half-shrug.  "I guess I'm just not feeling motivated right now."  

My response: "You took your eyes off the prize, that's all."

Huh?  I elaborated that she must have forgotten her goals.  Or, at least, she isn't focused on them at this present time.  "Why are you doing this?" I reiterated.   Well, of course, it's the usual......1) Feel better  2) Look better   etc, etc.  Did I mention that she's a recent cancer survivor?  

Keeping your focus on WHAT you want, WHY, and HOW you will get it is the basis of your motivation.  Laser focus pulls you through the I-don't-feel-like-it kind of days and gets your butt out of bed early before the work day.  If your WHY is strong enough, nothing will hold you back.

I left her thinking that day.  The wheels were turning.  I could almost hear her say, "Oh YAH!  Now I remember what I want."

Keep your eyes on the prize.  And go get it.

Always a work in progress

We will always have something to work on.  All of us...all of the time....our whole lives.  When we master something like a new health habit, pick a new thing to change.  Then, when you master that one, pick another....then another.  Build on the healthy ones that you previously mastered.  Then, when you feel on top of the world and are getting amazing results-- do a quick check to see if you've fallen off on anything or maybe started doing an old bad habit again.  Sometimes, you don't realize that you are routinely doing something that you used to do, but stopped doing, then started doing again.

Lately, I've been struggling with vegetables.  I like them.  I try and keep enough prepped to grab quickly.  BUT, I've been really busy lately and it is oh-so-easy to let it slide a little.  I mean, driving from client to client all day or having back to back sessions doesn't always make it easy to get in my 4-5 cups per day.  There is no excuse, it just takes effort.  That is one example of EVERYONE having to work on things.

How about 90/10 compliance as another example?  You know, eat 90% of your meals during the week on-plan and allowing a 10% off-plan choice (within reason).  This ensures maximum results in changing body composition.  It's hard.  Even for me sometimes.  A work in progress.

So, whatever you are working on for a habit right now, make sure that you are confident in doing this habit EVERY day.  If you are confident in your changes, you will make the change.  If you aren't, it's going to be a battle.  It's as hard as you make it.  Don't try to work on too many things at once.  Also, realize that those who make change seem effortless and have "amazing" bodies DO have to work at it....a lot.... (Dedication!  Consistency!)

The effort is worth it-- healthier body, healthier life.

Livestrong

Lately, I've gotten involved in a program affiliated with the Livestrong Foundation at our local YMCA.  It's a 12 week (FREE) program for cancer survivors and those who are currently battling cancer that meets twice a week to provide support and a basic exercise program.  My role as a volunteer is to be supportive and encouraging, as well as show them how to use the equipment at the Y.  I give them other ideas for exercise as well.  It's awesome!

My dad lost his battle with cancer almost two years ago.  Today happens to be the one year anniversary of my father-in-law losing his battle with cancer too.  I'm volunteering with the Livestrong program as a way of honoring them, as well as all of the other loved ones that I've lost to this awful disease.  I don't talk about them to the group members unless they ask, because I feel that these people are trying to survive this....right now...and maybe don't want to hear about the people that didn't win their battle.

What I love and admire the most about the group is that even though they've gone through a lot and have more ahead of them, they show up.  They come in with a positive attitude and I can almost read on their faces sometimes, "Hey! I have the energy to be here and I feel good enough to exercise!"  They support each other and even clap when there is good news.  They listen to the bad news as well.  Fatigued or not, they show up and do something.  That is truly Living Strong.  I leave each session inspired and think, "I do not really have problems."

Let's put this into perspective with our own lives.  What about you-- do you Live Strong?  Do you take care of your able body?  Do you show up?  

Live Strong.  

Control

Some of us like to feel in control.  I know I do.  I would deny being a control "freak," but I like to have a plan and know what is coming my way.  There are obviously many things in our lives that we CANNOT control.  

Let's identify a few:

-How the people around us act

-How fast the person in front of you drives

-What your friends and family do or say

-Other people's health (especially those that we take care of)

-Sometimes, our own health (viruses, certain disease, unintended injury, etc)

-What could possibly happen to us tomorrow

These, among a lot of other things, lead to stress.  Stress is a part of life.  Stress is very hard on us.  But, guess what?! We CAN control how we respond to stress.  You don't have to let it take a toll on your health, which most of us let happen.  (Sleepless nights?  Higher blood pressure?  Appetite for sugar and starchy carbs?  Weight gain around your middle?  Yep- all responses to continuous stress.)

The good news is that even when your day or a situation feels out of control, there really is something you can do for yourself.  You can control your response.  How do you do that?  First, you realize that stress happens AROUND you, not TO you.  Then, you have a choice:  

1) Stuff the stress down internally and try to control what is uncontrollable, leading to poor health.

2) Find an outlet to drain it all out and keep your situation manageable.

I choose #2.  

My favorite outlet to stress is a hard workout or even just getting up and moving my body around.  Some of my best weight lifting/gym sessions have been in response to a stressful day!  My past outlet was eating. (Not healthy eating either, but emotional-grab-the-first-thing-I-see-eating!)  This is a toughie....emotional and stress eating isn't doing you any favors.  

Instead, what can you do in response to stress or any situation in life that you can't control?  Here are a few alternative things to try:

-Taking deep breaths.  Any number for any amount of time.

-Physically stepping away from the point of stress or stressful situation

-If you feel the need to put something in your mouth, grab a glass/bottle of water and chug it

-Scream and yell.....just let it out!

-Keep your hands busy 

-Do something completely mindless (coloring book, doodle, etc)

-Pick up a good book

-Take a hot soak or long hot shower

-Do something nice for yourself, like get your hair or nails done

-Some people like retail therapy!

-Yoga or meditation

-Pray

-Walk/run/take the stairs/ANYTHING active

-Talk to someone about it all

My guess is that you know all of this.  You've heard all of this.  In a world that you can't control, it's nice to have a reminder of what to do to take care of yourself.  It's nice to have a reminder that we all have difficult times and want to grasp onto SOMETHING that we can have a say in.  So, control what you can and let the rest go.  Your health will benefit in the long run.

Some things are hard to change....like your personality

I have quite a few clients that I would say have the "All or Nothing" personality.  I know that I've talked about this in at least one previous post, but it's worth re-visiting right now because I'm seeing the detriments of this personality traits rearing up a lot lately.  

It's hard to watch my clients struggle, and this is what they are struggling with:  It's okay to do SOMETHING.  SOMETHING is better than NOTHING when you can't do the ALL.  What does this look like in practical application?  Well, one might think, "I have no time for my one hour workout today, so I'm going to skip it completely."  OR, "I didn't have time to plan my meals this week, so I just winged it and ate whatever."  

Is this you?  If you can't get it 100% right, you just stop trying?  That's a LOT of pressure to put on yourself, don't you think?

So, what if you slowly teach yourself to do "something" in times of busyness or low motivation (because those are two big culprits for this personality type!)?  The "something" of the above examples could be-

1) Going for a 20 or 30 minute walk or doing just part of your workout routine and then celebrating that you got SOMETHING in!

2) Finding a fast ritual once or twice a week to hard boil a few eggs, chop a few veggies or cook up a few extra chicken breasts to have ready and make your life easier.  Even if you don't have a menu planned, you can utilize these things to eat in a healthy way.  It's SOMETHING.

When my clients come to me with these frustrations, we talk about what they've done right....we find that something that they didn't realize they were doing and use it to pull them forward in their journey.  Nobody can be perfect all the time.  But, that's no reason to give up on yourself and your efforts.  It's exhausting to have to start over...over and over again.  Find some small "somethings" and practice them.  Then, practice them some more.  The motivation will follow and so will results!

Sustainability

The other day, I ran into an acquaintance at the convenience store.  We were near the checkouts....I was in line to pay for gasoline and he was hungrily eyeballing the shelf of pre-made crispie bars, rolls, cookies, etc.  "Hey, ___ (name withheld), how are you?" I said.  "Hungry!" he replied.  "I lost ten pounds in the past few weeks.  It wasn't fun.  I am glad for the weight loss, but the things I had to give up to get there I just can't give up anymore.  I can't do that.  I'm here to get something for myself....I have to have it."  

My reply to him was, "That's too bad that it was such a tough experience.  It shouldn't be that hard."  I wished him well and walked out, but not before noticing that he had a gigantic box of cookies in his hands.  

Clearly whatever this gentleman was doing was not sustainable.  He made it two weeks with some results, but caved and dove head first into a box of something that will get him back to square one in no time.  I meant it when I said that change doesn't have to be so hard and it doesn't have to be scary.  It can even be fun....when you see results that you can hold long term....when you show yourself that you CAN do it.

Yo-yo dieting usually stems from too many changes too fast or trying to change a habit that you just aren't ready to tackle yet.  That is not something that will last.  Then- you have to start all over again.  How frustrating!   When I work with my clients on nutrition, we choose ONE habit at a time.  A habit that they are ready to work on and can do every day for a certain amount of time so that it becomes natural.  When they conquer that habit, they work on a new habit.  That seems do-able, right?

You choose- extreme changes and yo-yoing or small changes and sustainable success. Does food control you or do You control food?

This is 40

So, today, I turned 40.  It's still sinking in.....I don't feel any different, but all day I've been thinking, "Huh.  I'm in a new decade!  Where did my 30s go?"  My 30s were a time of having babies and raising them.  A lot of it was a time where I wasn't happy with myself.  Frankly, I didn't take care of myself because I took care of everyone else.  Today, this mid-life point made me both reflect on the past AND look into the future.  I mean, what do I want 40 to look like?

What I always thought 40 would be: ("always" meaning my teenage years until mid-thirties)

-doomed to elastic "mom jeans" 

-frumpiness

-the end of youth

-depressing

-immediate weight gain and the end of my metabolism

-wrinkles and creakiness

-the start of a mid-life crisis

-just a list of negative things in general

What 40 is actually going to be:

-full of potential not only personally, but professionally

-learning to be even more comfortable in my own skin

-youth in my mind, body, and spirit

-a desire to learn more about a whole lot of things!

-enjoyment in my kids becoming evermore independent and awesome

-prosperity

-an opportunity to be generous and inspirational

-a year to connect to others in new ways

-I want to push myself out of my comfort zone and do things that I haven't tried or accomplished before

-some of the best times of my life

Sure, there are gray hairs and fine lines, but I'm embracing it.  If someone mistakes me for a 31 year old, that's even better!  (That did happen recently!) Age is just a number, it's not who I am.  

Woo hoo, 40!!!  Bring it on!